Mourning the Boy[Space]Friend

Growing up I was one of those girls that hung out with the dudes and all the chicks hated because I was so chill. I was totally, without a doubt, one of the guys. I grew up with boys in my household. I hung with boys almost exclusively. In fact, it wasn't until much later in life that I really began to learn how to be friends with girls; actually, I'm still learning. 


Boy[space]friends are good for several reason. Casual flirtation is a essential part of life. Girls that are used to being around boys can casually flirt no problem. Flirting is fun. It's necessary. It makes life more interesting and playful. Usually the chicks who are anti-flirtation are those than only have one setting to flirting: I'm-going-to-bed-you flirting. Sad. 


It's good to have a boy[space]friend you can confide in for a different opinion. Chicks and dudes have completely different thought processes. Girl friends can so easily (and with good intentions) turn into yes-men. No one needs yes-men 24/7. Sometimes it's nice to have a dude that's going to tell you the honest truth, even if it hurts your feelings. 


There's also a level of comfort and compassion a boy[space]friend can provide that a female friend cannot. And no, not in the dirty sense. In the everything-is-going-to-be-okay sense. Sometimes the presence of a dude can just make you feel safe. Chicks can't always do that. 


But now I'm looking around my life and realize that somehow all of my platonic male friends have gone missing. So where are they? Some of them never grew up. Still running the same childish game from ten years ago. You can call them up at anytime, but you don't really want to. They'll still be talking about high school and doing things that most people have long grown out of. Some of them you just grew apart from. Lost touch over the years for no good reason. Some are married and/or have children, making a full-time friendship with a single chick somewhat inappropriate/unrealistic/questionable/etc.


It's just sad that it happens. And there's no way to fix it.